Today is the 10th anniversary since my father passed away. Seems like yesterday, seems like a hundred years ago. He was a good man and I loved him very much. He struggled for seven years with lung cancer but finally lost the fight after a brief stint of relatively good health his last couple years.
Two days ago, my husband's father was taken to the emergency room by ambulance. He became very ill, dehydrated and virtually passed out. He remains in the hospital being tested for everything and yet they don't know anything.
Today, my mother-in-law had to go to the doctor because she is severely congested and "coming down with something".
This all happens as we were preparing to go to Oklahoma and celebrate their 60th wedding anniversary this weekend. We leave tomorrow, and as it turns out is a blessing that we will be there to help them with this latest, in a long line, of health crisis.
My in-laws have an execeptional ability to withstand and persevere all that is thrown at them and the list is of biblical proportions. To date they have battled: breast cancer, colitis, heart surgery, colostomy, illiostomy, diverticulitis, broken bones, infections, pneumonia, gallbladder removal, hysterectomy, prostate surgery, compartment syndrome (almost lost her leg), pacemaker, pagets disease, severe arthritis, jaw and face reconstruction, bowel obstruction emergency surgery, shingles - not to mention all the regular stuff.
We joke that they have a wing at the hosptial named after them (not really) but they could. They have looked the devil in the eye on many occasions and spit at him. If you ask them how they are doing, they will say "fine". They will be in more agony and sincere pain when the Oklahoma Sooner football team loses a game - or the basketball or baseball teams.
They are tough, midwestern, hardy people. Part Indian, and part everything else. I think the Indian blood, makes the difference. I have seen it in my son and husband. High pain tolerance, never complain when sick.
My hope tomorrow is to get to Oklahoma and go straight to the hospital and cheer up my father-in-law. At 84 it's not the optimum place to be for your 60th wedding anniversary party. We will do what we can while we are there but it won't be enough.
They still live in their own home and between the two of them manage to keep things going. It's much more difficult for them but they don't complain.
True to their Oklahoma mentality they will not give up, they will pick themselves up, dust themselves off and march forward.
Seems to me after living so many years it should be the other way around. You should feel great, be able to enjoy the fruits of your labor and be relaxed and fulfilled. Instead you have a medicine cabinet full of pills, a walker to help you get around, difficulty sleeping, eating and doing everyday chores.
Beside your own condition you worry about your children, grandchildren, family members, neighbors and friends. Should be that we only worry about what fun thing you want to do or see that day.
Many seniors are lonely and fall into the trappings of unscrupulous sales people or scammers who take their money and prey on their weakened conditions. There should be a special place in hell for those people.
As I near the senior life, I realize how important living everyday like it is your last is really good practice.
Next time you think about the elder/senior in your life give them a little extra time and care, they have earned it and really appreciate it cause...
YOUR TURN IS COMING!
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